My First Blog

Dear Reader, (whoever you might be) 3:22 am

You will have to bare will me, as this is my first blog ever. I decided to write this blog, b/c, well, b/c I can't sleep. Living life, with little to no sleep tends to bring a different spin on everyday life. At night, when the dark creeps in and it seems there is no one else in the world but you there, you're thoughts wander. It's weird, and it's infuriating and it's beautiful all at once.

It's weird, to be awake when no one else is. When you can't reach out and call someone, when you could drive down the road and see not a single solitary car on the road, as if there is no one else in the world but you. It's infuriating, when you watch your husband fall asleep in 5 seconds flat, or when my mom can fall asleep in mid sentence while she's talking to me, or anyone. When you wish more than anything that sweet sleep would come, come fast and come at the right time. But, it's also beautiful. I walk outside in the back yard, and sit on my swing, totally quiet, totally by myself and watch the stars. I'm free, for a while, of ringing phones, neverending errands, and mindless chatter. I hear the whistle of the trains and know, that there ARE other people out there, awake. That's oddly comforting.

I know this sounds like a complaint. And for the most part, it's not. It just is... and sometimes, when the silence gets too much... and I need to get these thoughts out... I'm going to write. I come by this pretty honestly. My grandmother was an insomniac, my father is an insomniac, now me... and I'm afraid, my daughter will be too. However, with this comes time to think, time to do, and time to blog.

Til tomorrow... or is it today? I'm off to scrapbook something. Or else to read. Or to watch tivo. Or clean another closet. Or do a load of laundry. Or drink a cup of tea. The possibilities are endless, at 3:30 am. when you have no where to go, no where to be, and all the time in the night.

Sleep tight.